CNN iReport

What are our American values?

If you had asked me when I was attending Catholic elementary and high school, I would have told you that our American values were helping the poor, championing the little guy/oppressed, and ensuring that everyone had equality and dignity. It was the '80s and I really believed that we were a nation of Christians, helping those who needed our help. We were USA for Africa. We were AIDS. We were FarmAId. Those were the roots of my fiscally conservative and socially moderate beliefs. You know, secure your oxygen mask before assisting others with theirs, but both were vital and important.

In college, I had a different opinion. I saw American values as fighting against the unjust, the ability to live free and prosper, and the freedom of thought, religion, and expression of opposition to those in power. I'm a Gen-Xer; our champion cause was bucking authority and blazing our own paths. College showed me that no one was looking out for me, so why look out for them? Time softened that.

While opening and running my business, my values changed to fairness, equal opportunity, and community building. I saw (and still see) the benefit of being a community leader, a provider of fair wages and good benefits, and a purveyor of valuable services. I still feel it's my obligation to value my employees' well being as much as my own, although it's not the popular opinion in the business world.

Right after 9/11, I saw our strongest American value as collectivism, the common goal to unite for our country against one common enemy. That disappeared quickly, even before we invaded Iraq. Damn, what the hell happened?

Today, I can't even begin to define American values, but I know the most important missing one: compromise. For centuries our differing American values on whatever political tightrope we walked worked in harmony with civil debate and compromise. Religion co-existed with the environmental causes. Capitalism co-existed with strong social programs.  But now it's like we're a binge dieting society now: the party in power starves out the other party until it usurps that power and starves the opposition party. Clueless and pointless. Ds are not better than Rs and vice versa. Too many refuse to listen to opinions other than their own.

Yesterday someone on iReports made a great point: Is Republicans' fear mongering worse than the Democrats' vindictive blackmailing guilt trips? The answer, of course, is NO. The terms "racist" and "socialist" flow like water; our pols turn us against each other and manufacture controversy to further their own fight. We allow media dingbats of all persuasions to guide our conscience and spread misinformation without wondering what big corp is behind that motivation. (hint: it ain't just Fox, folks.) How can we possibly move into the 21st century when our core American values seem to be greed, hatred, and lack of respect for differing opinions? The rest of the world is noticing; are you?