CNN iReport

A white woman marries a Latino /Mexican/Hispanic man.  Can it work?  Or will there always been some sort of boxing match in the ring?  What are your thoughts on this?

Here is a story of a white woman whose "fiance" was brutally beat while her sister was walking down the road with him.  Someone shouted out the word, "spic" and a fight ensued.  Two days later her fiance died.  Here is the story........click on link!

http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/10/22/lia.shenandoah.killing/index.html

I have two stories that are personal to me and my experience.  My oldest sister, a beautiful  blond, was enamored by a man from Puerto Rico and he her.  The first signs of trouble were his x wife who was very jealous of my sister and him, crossing over to a white "blonde" woman.  Why the hair color matters, I don't understand. This woman stalked, terrorized and hasseled my sister for several years.  My sister did not play into her hand.  She loved her man and he loved her.  Some people thought she was marrying "beneath" herself...I never understood that.  What I can tell you today.  They had two daughters.  The oldest daughter was born with cerebral palsy and has been a big challenge yet a huge reward of love in their life.  My sister and her husband have loved this girl unconditionally!  It was the way he was raised and his caretaking abilities and the love for my sister that kept it strong.  Their other daughter was born fine and she is now a proud Mom of two children. In my sister's family there is a powerful and strong bond of love and care.  I admire and respect the challenges they have been put through with their daughter.  I am happy to say they have been married over thirty years now and have retired very happily together!  For my sister and her family, it worked and it worked well! :)

My daughter is with a Mexican man and she has been with him several years.  He has a son, and my daughter is helping to raise him.  I bluntly asked her why she was "dating" him.  She told me Mom he is good to me, he treats me right, the way I want and need to be treated.  With both my sister and daughter it was not about money, status, race, it was about who the person was and how they were loved and could give the love back.  It has worked for my daughter.  She actually prefers this type of man because she has been deeply hurt by boys/man of her own race.  It is the heart that matters.

From the way I was raised and what I have witnessed in my family these two actually seem to be doing  better than most ......

I have been in 2 relationships and they were both of my same ethnic group.  The things that lead to separation I would never wish on anyone.  I  had never imagined myself with anyone other than my race.  I see it has worked in these two cases.  My feelings have since changed.  I can honestly say that the Mexican (not sure about Latino/Hispanic) they refer themselves as "Mexican" men I have met  where I am all  have been totally respectable, nice, loving and supportive to me.  It seems they try harder and want to be more pleasing.  Several of my friends have encouraged me to "give it a chance"....I have contemplated it...and I know in my heart of hearts what I want.  I know that not every man can give me what I want.  And from all my observations, I can honestly say, that I do believe that I am OK with it and if it comes down to do, I'd do it in a heartbeat.  It works, I've seen it work, and I am ready to do something different and give it a try!  :)   I know the type of heart I love, and you are what you behold, if they behold the same thing, and I love their heart, that is all that matters!  It is what will keep mine beating!

Race or not, for me, "it's a matter of the heart".....

Blessings and peace to "true" and genuine love,

Suzanne Newkirk

Humanitarian