CNN iReport

I have a proposal. Why don't we just split the US into two separate countries?

Country One:

The Republicans can have Alaska and Texas, and a bunch of the middle if they want it. I guess pretty much the Red States. They can call themselves "The Red States of America, or the RSA. (Beauty) Queen Sarah can reign supreme, with the old guy. They can ban books, abortion, birth control, and science; issue guns to every citizen; rape and pillage the environment; hunt endangered species; bomb wolves from helicopters; kill the whales; drill now, everywhere; build more pipelines; drive drunk; host beauty pageants; promote abstinence (aka "teen pregnancy").

They can have Chief Justice Roberts and Justices Scalia, Thomas, and Alito from the Supreme Court. They can fight in unnecessary wars, give tax breaks to the rich, and screw the middle class. They can build up a huge debt, and spend billions of taxpayer dollars to bail out failed businesses. They can foolishly alienate themselves from all the countries on the globe, including former strong allies.

They can unfairly fire people. They can get government grants to build things, not build them, but keep the money. Their money can say "In a Pentecostal God We Trust."

They can declare in their charter that marriage can only happen between a man and a woman (preferably an older man and a younger, wealthy trophy wife). If they have a less than favored leader, they can pretend he doesn't exist. They can opt not to issue passports, because citizens will have no interest in other cultures. They can teach Creationism.

Wasilla, Alaska can be the capitol of the RSA.

Country 2:

The Democrats get the coasts, plus Hawaii: perhaps "The Blue States of America," or BSA. Obama and Biden will govern.

The BSA can keep the old USA documents such as the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights, since seventy percent of the original 13 states stay with the BSA (but they will clear up that unfortunate "right to bear arms" ambiguity).

As you might have guessed, I want to live in the BSA.